Calamities & Confessions

I was mesmerized. Narrow gauge train tracks rolled out beneath my feet as I stood on the observation platform at the end of the train.

Mile after mile, sometimes curving around a mountain, sometimes straight across a meadow. A picture of life, I thought. Sometimes we think we know what’s ahead—education, marriage, career, children.

But there are times we can’t imagine what lies ahead—or we don’t want to. Clues—a cancer diagnosis, a spouse’s suspected unfaithfulness, an employer’s tightening budget—warn us that we may be headed to the dark side of a mountain . . . or over its edge.

How can we walk through uncertain times? To where do the tracks lead? Who can reassure our desperate souls?

Are you in unwanted circumstances? I am.

I can’t see far down the ‘train tracks’ of my life, but I know enough. Diminishing vision with no clear diagnosis, no real treatment. It's my 24/7/365 reality and it's getting worse. The trends in our culture for under-lit restaurants, darkened auditoriums, and dim hotel rooms all push my fear and discomfort buttons.

I can't change the world, but I can influence a change in my life. It's more than that though.

· It's the unknown. How will I cook when I can't measure ingrediants?

· It's the losses. How will I read to my grandchildren when I can’t make out the words on the page?

· It's the fears. How will I survive if something happens to my husband?

· It's the thousand points of frustration every day.

This could get ugly. Unless. Unless, God does a work in me.

The first step is to see the need and tell God about it. Would you take that step with me?

Prayer: God, I am needy. I can’t see my way through this mess. I feel like falling apart. So, I lay it all before you—the unknown, the losses, the fears, the frustrations. I know you are enough.

(Excerpt from my new photo book, Never Lost: following God through uncertain times)