You better watch out, you better not cry Better not pout, I'm telling you why Mother’s Day is comin' to town It's making a list and checking it twice Gonna find out who's naughty and nice Mother’s Day is comin' to town (adapted from Santa Claus is Comin’ to Town)
If there were such a list for mothers, on which list would your mom’s name be found? I’m guessing that most people would believe their mother’s name would be on the “nice” list. We know she’s not perfect, but her heart is in the right place.
If you are a mother, on which list would you put your name? Do you give yourself as much grace as you give to others? Are you willing to give yourself a pass for doing your best, even if you’re not perfect? Can you see the jewels of blessings jumbled among the pricks of pain, seeds of sorrow, and the ruins of unfilled expectations?
If not, I can identify.
Ever since our son died (by suicide) over six years ago, Mother’s Day has been painful. If I could have slept through the day or obliterated the observance from the calendar, I would have.
Don’t get me wrong. The idea of observing Mother’s Day is noble and even scriptural. (Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her. Proverbs 31:28)
But there are a lot of mothers (as well as women who aren’t moms, but would like to be) in pain. For them, Mother’s Day reminds them of their failures (perceived or real). The images portrayed in the media with the message, “Happy Mother’s Day,” rubs salt into open wounds.
Yes, there are sweet memories and many things to treasure, but the wound is always there.
Wounds become less painful over time, but Mother’s Day may never be the happy time it once was. And that’s okay. To totally deny the pain is to deny the importance of the person’s life who died. Or it denies the opportunity for spiritual growth and closeness to the Lord that the pain could bring.
One way I try to minimize my Mother’s Day discomfort is to pray for others who are hurting. This year I sent several cards with heartfelt notes to hurting moms and wrote special cards for my mom and mother-in-law. In short, I cared for someone else which helped get my eyes off myself.
This is one reason that all my books are on sale through Mother’s Day. This year I wanted to intentionally encourage moms in their spiritual walk and I want to help you do that as well. My recently released book, Soul Pursuit: The Busy Person's Guide to Biblical Meditation is 50% off for the eBook version and 35% off for the paperback (read the first chapter for free at my website). My gift books (packed with encouraging writings and beautiful photography) are all 10% off (read them all for free at my website).
Are you hurting this Mother’s Day? I trust you will find encouragement in Christ. Is there a mom you could encourage? Consider taking a few moments to send an email, text, or belated Mother’s Day card.